Man Mistakenly Cuts Off Penis, Dog Eats It
Man Mistakenly Cuts Off Penis, Dog Eats It
2 hours, 22 minutes ago
Oddly Enough - Reuters
BUCHAREST (Reuters) - A elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken's neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it, the state Rompres news agency said Monday.
It said 67 year-old Constantin Mocanu, from a village near the southeastern town of Galati, rushed out into his yard in his underwear to kill a noisy chicken keeping him awake at night.
"I confused it with the chicken's neck," Mocanu, who was admitted to the emergency hospital in Galati, was quoted as saying. "I cut it ... and the dog rushed and ate it."
Doctors said the man, who was brought in by an ambulance bleeding heavily, was now out of danger.
posted by adam at 11:09 AM
6 Comments:
How many penis cutting stories is this now? 365?
12:12 PM
Man, that's a double doozy. I mean, it's bad enough to cut off your own wanker, but then to have the dog up and eat it...that's just more than anyone should have to deal with.
As an aside, we seem to be overly focused on male genitalia these last few posts...
12:14 PM
At least he's 67 and wouldn't have much use for it anyway.
Plus, I know what animal I'd be goin' after next with my hatchet.
8:07 PM
This post raises more questions than answers...there is much more to the story than has been told.
1st of all, why was his penis exposed while he was "cutting off the chicken's neck"?
2nd, why was his penis so close to the chicken?
3rd, how could he mistake a penis (and not just any penis, his OWN penis still attached to his body) for a feather-covered, squirming, and squaking bird?
This guy is clearly lying, or leaving out a very important piece of the story. What instrument was he using to cut? A knife? Shears? A hatchet? No matter which of these, it is 100% more likely to cut a finger off than one's penis. To cut the penis one would have to bring the instrument down directly along the abdomen CLEARLY ENDANGERING THE PENIS! And once again, why was the chicken's neck directly alongside his exposed penis in order for him to cut it off while attempting to kill the bird?
A more likely scenario: The man is raping the bird, which would explain all the yelling and squaking that the neighbors heard, when someone sees him in the act. He realizes that he has to make up a story as to why he had a bird up in his naked crotch. He decides to claim he was trying to kill it and quickly thinks of a way to provide evidence of this, but since he is by now madly in love with the bird he just made-love to, he instead cuts off his own penis saying "oh I thought it was the bird's neck, while I was trying to KILL it." And that, although sick, is a much more plausible explanation of this man's situation.
9:54 PM
I don't know about plausability, but it sure makes for a hell of a lot of hilarious-ability.
4:45 AM
This event gives us a very valuable lesson: when confronted with excessive noise always choke the chicken, as any other behavior may result in bodily harm.
11:26 AM
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